


if you had said no, then you might still have me

by timelessphan



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), dan and phil
Genre: DAN AND PHIL - Freeform, Drinking, F/M, Lots of drinking, M/M, Phan - Freeform, Phandom - Freeform, Some Fluff, Some Swearing, amazingbookisnotonfire makes an appearance, but the ending is hilarious trust me, connor tries to be the best friend ever and he succeeds, dan writes, danyul and philip, more like takes a pen apart and puts it back together, mostly angst, oops :), some shouting, they go to a bar, uhhhh, you'll kill me but it's hilarious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-10
Updated: 2015-09-10
Packaged: 2018-04-20 02:30:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4770218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/timelessphan/pseuds/timelessphan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the one where dan is jealous but he doesn't say anything and there are some consequences for that</p>
            </blockquote>





	if you had said no, then you might still have me

“can we go out?” phil asked.

dan shrugged. “why?”

“because we’ve written a book. because we’ve made an app. we’ve got a gazillion things to celebrate about.” phil over-exaggeratedly rolled his eyes (his neck lolling on his head because he was being so over-exaggerated).

dan smiled and shrugged again, gazing at phil fondly as he moved his hands rapidly and begged for dan to go out with him.

“plus,” phil said, “i’ve already RSVP’d to louise saying we would go. a bunch of youtube friends will be there! c’mon, dan, pleeeease?”

“i’m definitely not saying yes,” dan teased. “but i could go for a drink to celebrate some things.”

phil grinned.

“who knows what’ll happen tonight? a few drinks, and we could go a bit crazy.” he winked suggestively.

dan closed his eyes and sighed with a soft smile spreading its way across his face, lighting it up.

“everyone thinks you’re the most innocent person ever. how on earth were you able to deceive them?” dan asked.

“acting, m’dear. it takes skills - with a z - to fool so many people with a small, plush lion.” he sauntered away, humming to himself as he made his way into the lounge.

“god, i love you.” dan laughed.

+++

dan was no longer with phil, as he was sitting at the bar with some company dan didn’t know.

instead, dan was sitting at a table with a looseleaf piece of paper in front of him. the pen in his fingers wasn’t writing, but being taken apart and put back together again.

"whatcha doin'?" a man's voice asked dan.

"just... writing." dan replied, showing connor the pen poised between his fingers, clicking and unclicking it a few times to emphasize (and partially to make sure he didn’t mess up in putting the pen back together in his jealousy over phil with people he didn’t know. but he wasn’t that person. he wouldn’t let this affect him).

“sure doesn’t look like it,” connor remarked. "dan.. are you okay?"

"of course," dan said quietly. he cleared his throat and said louder, "yeah. i'm ecstatic."

"you keep looking at phil as if he's vermin." connor pointed out.

"yeah, well, he's - i'm jealous. you know how it gets, that thing that boyfriends and girlfriends do where one gets jealous but they either don't say anything or break the beer bottle against the offender's head."

connor slowly smiled. "should i go up to him? shove that girl off of him and make a scene?"

dan chuckled lowly and grinned. "nah, connor. take a seat if you want, but don't make a scene."

"no promises," connor winked.

dan looked again at phil and internally flipped out when the vultu- girl tried to swoop in and kiss phil.

yeah, their relationship wasn't out to the public. their youtuber friends knew, but these innocent bystanders at the club didn't know. phil especially knew, but he... didn't exactly stop her.

dan almost started crying.

he literally felt his heart sink into his stomach and suddenly he was aware of the shakiness in every breath he took.

he shook his head and closed his eyes, turning back to connor with a polite (forced) smile.

"i think i'm going to go, actually." dan said. "sorry."

connor looked behind him and his mouth dropped open in an 'o' shape. "oh my god, dan. do you want me to come with you? moral support?"

"no, connor. i'm okay. i'll be alright, i just... need to clear my head in a quiet, disclosed place."

"fine. call me, text me later, something so i know you're okay." connor made him swear that he would before getting up and escorting him to the door.

"i'm really sorry." he said as the two went their separate ways.

"so am i," dan replied.

‘god, i hate you,’ he thought to himself.

+++

"dan, i said i'm sorry that i left you to leave on your own."

"i know you did."

"then why are you still upset with me?" phil asked, sounding sincerely concerned.

dan shook his head.

"it's not you. i'm just not having a good day."

"we went to the bar, we celebrated. we saw friends, it's been a great day," phil reciprocated, looking confused.

"not for me!" dan shouted as he pulled an Elsa (you know, the part where Anna takes off Elsa’s glove and she freaks the fuck out), his imaginary cape swishing behind him, his eyes showing that he was about to burst with rage.

phil was silent.

"why hasn't it been a good day for you, dan?" phil asked quietly, calmly.

dan groaned, running his fingers through his hair.

"because you didn't stop her from swooping down and kissing you! you had a chance! you could have just said 'i'm sorry, i don't like girls in that way' but no! you let her," dan's voice broke (along with his fuCKING HEART) when he uttered those last three words.

phil, again, was lost for words.

dan tried to say something multiple times, but his voice just didn't seem to be working anymore.

"i didn't think you saw that," phil whispered.

"not only did i see it, but i physically felt my heart go numb! i watched, in slow-fucking-motion as you killed me without a murder weapon! i heard my breath shake and i felt my head pounding! you-" dan opened his mouth but nothing came out.

"who even are you?" he whispered, sounding so broken, so much like a child, that phil wanted to hug him.

he wasn't going to.

dan would push him off so quickly that phil wouldn't know why the front door was slamming and why he had fallen over.

phil took a step towards dan, reaching out to comfort him.

dan took one step back, looking like a deer in headlights.

phil repeated the action.

dan pressed himself against the wall, shrinking away from phil.

"dan," phil said.

dan closed his eyes and turned his head away from phil.

"dan," phil repeated.

"what?" dan spat back so ferociously that phil jumped.

"you know i love you."

"sure doesn't fuCKING seem like it." dan snapped.

"dan, i love you."

"stop." dan whispered.

"i love you."

"don't-"

"i love you."

"no-"

"dan, next time - although there will not be a next time - just make a scene. i'll probably laugh."

dan's hands fumbled as he searched for his doorknob, opening the door immediately when he found it, and slammed the door shut in phil's face.

he closed his eyes and flopped on the bed (his door was now locked and blocked by his piano).

"'i love you', my ass. you're not my phil lester. where's my phil lester?" he said aloud.

"i'm outside your door, love." said phil.

"you're. not. my. phil!" dan shouted, taking a breath between each word.

phil sat down against the door.

"what have you done with my phil?" dan mumbled, closing his eyes and slowly falling asleep.

his last thought was ‘god, i loathe you.’

phil ended up sleeping outside his door, making him breakfast in bed, and making promises to a completely wrecked dan. 

dan just viewed them as empty "i love you"s.

+++

he packed his bags the next day.

“please, don’t leave.” phil had whispered, trying to touch his arm to stop him.

“phil…” dan said in that way he does, the love-stricken voice that was now lined with annoyance and incompetence. “you were going to hide something from me. you lied to me. you would never have cheated if you had truly loved me. so just fuck off. for once in my life, i don’t want to see you!”

phil sighed. 

“before you go, i wanted to tell you that i really did love you. i really did. i just didn’t as much anymore, lately.”

dan’s heart lurched, but he didn’t know why. he was so utterly done with phil, he was not staying again.

“the spark was gone. and i’m sorry about that. i’m sorry i didn’t tell you, i’m sorry i cheated, but most of all, i’m sorry that you didn’t feel the demise too.”

dan’s mouth dropped open slightly.

“you’re sorry i never stopped loving you? wow. that’s a great way to end our relationship, phil. you’re becoming more charming each and every day.” dan snapped sarcastically.

phil stared at the ground.

“i guess we aren’t dan-and-phil anymore. i suppose it’ll just be dan and… phil, you’re crying and it’s really making my dramatic exit speech hard to deliver.”

phil sniffed.

“i’m sorry,” he whispered.

dan nodded and opened the door, but before departing, he delivered the final blow.

“april fools.”

**Author's Note:**

> oh yes, the infamous april fools. didn't see that coming, eh, folks? (neither did i until i typed it oops hi)


End file.
